Tuesday, April 7, 2009

5 things I'm afraid of

So the challenge to post 5 fears seemed simple enough to tackle tonight and I did. Here's my 5.

1. I am afraid of stinging insects. Namely, bees and wasps. I will duck and run and try not to swat at them and anger them. One summer I was stung by a wasp who had decided my swing set was a great place to build a nest. It hurt a lot. So now I go out of my way to avoid a stinger.

2. I am afraid of a horrible natural disaster happening to me. I've been in tiny earthquakes, hid from a tornado, had my car crushed by straight-line winds, and so far have been spared. But tornadoes, quakes, and other destructive forces are stuff of nightmares.

3. Along the same lines, I'm afraid of accidents. I'm ever vigilant for semis on bald tires, deer that want to leap in front of me, or odd things, like spontaneous combustion. I watch planes flying overhead, thinking about the destruction a crash would cause. If things could suddenly happen because I had simply thought of them, I'd have died or caused the deaths of many people! I guess being vigilant means I am defensive and avoid all scenarios that could result in dangerous situations, but actually I'm a klutz and hardly think things through, especially when at home. I bet I die in some sort of freak home accident!

4. I'm afraid of peeping toms. The thought that someone is maliciously watching me with glowing red scooby-doo-cartoon eyes through the window gives me the willies. It's only when I'm alone in a dark room that I feel this way. I blame TV. I get this weird exposed feeling in my back and desire to protect it by turning so my back is to a wall or against a surface. This usually means I am looking at the windows though. Which is conducive to imagining those eyes, and makes me breathe faster and also move faster. I used to close my eyes and make a run for it, just to get to the lit rooms with other people.

5. I am also afraid of losing the people I love. Sometimes I forget how fragile life is. I take for granted seeing my children, kissing my husband, hugging my parents. I fear the financial burden with the logical part of my brain, and the loss and grief with the emotional side. I do try to make memories with my family. But in the end, it won't be quite the consolation I'll need.



Side note: whenever I dream of tornadoes, I also dream of my grandma. I guess she is my comfort, or guardian in my dream. I always look to her for shelter. I haven't dreamed of them in a long time, which must mean my life is not in turmoil right now..??

2 comments:

g2 (la pianista irlandesa) said...

Nice addition with the pics, Elsha. I like, I like much. I think my father shares your fear 1. You'll have to remind me to tell you that story...

Ana Cristina said...

Neat post. And I promise I read the whole thing this time, unlike last time, when I made you the mother of a beautiful baby girl. (But still, you gotta admit, she is beautiful. ;-D

My five fears? Spiders x's 5. I hate the damn things. And they always seem to find me, too.