Don't EVER say God does things for a reason

There are some bad Christians out there, false prophets, twisting theology to their own means, creating in society a hatred for what they believe are Christian practices.

I'm going to focus on one.

DON'T EVER SAY "GOD DOES THINGS FOR A REASON"!

Don't ever tell a grieving parent that God needed their child as an angel.
Don't ever tell a depressed person that God is letting them suffer for a reason that we don't understand.
Don't ever tell a natural disaster survivor that their life was ripped apart as part of God's will.
Don't say that God LETS bad things happen.

Who are you to claim to know God's will??

"And we know that God works all things together for the good of those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28

Does that mean the 'bad people' who 'don't love God' are exempt? That he turns his back on them and does nothing to help them? NO. He is working to change the hearts of ALL people to love. Some people are not changed yet.

I will point to the scripture that says: "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. Gen 50:20" This is Joseph, grown up, forgiving his brothers for selling him into slavery at the age of 17.

It does not say GOD intended harm. GOD intended good. He took the bad situation, the negative consequences, and He found a way for His good to still happen.

So you might throw back at me Ecclesiastes chapter 3 "In everything there is a season, a time for... (vs 3) killing and a time for healing..." Does this mean God plans or allows bad things? NO. Killing was allowed as a punishment for some crimes under the Law of Moses, or in war, or in defending yourself.  There is a time for killing, but it is NOT God doing it in this scripture.

Stop pulling things out of context.

He works IN SPITE OF, THROUGH, AROUND, and IN THE MIDST OF our screw ups, our effects that we caused. He has a plan, a grand scheme, a goal, and it is good.

Listen, God is NOT the author, He is the master of reworking flaws. He is not creating situations in which His characters, His people, get hurt. He is not George R.R. Martin. He is a sculptor whose critical eye works with flaws to make something beautiful and good.

Tragedies happen and despite them, despite the evil in the world, God is there. He takes each hiccup we throw at him and he works it into the creation. Nothing we do can throw him off his goal.

GOD MAKES IT WORK.

In order to come into a spirit more closely aligned with God...

Let's be realistic. We are screwing things up in our lives if we personify God as having human qualities of jealousy, revenge, and a penchant for watching people fall down. The reality is that He sees it all and can predict certain outcomes based on our choices fueled by our emotional state. He knows us. He finds a way to bring us around that does not harm us.

Let's be forgiving, and not in the 'I'm sorry' kind of way. The word forgiveness means carrying the burden of sin for the other person. You don't let their actions have the intended effects. Work around, through, and in the midst of the issue, the drama, to heal. God forgives, not letting our causes have the effects we were heading towards.

Let's be trusting. Nothing is so evil it cannot be redeemed in the eyes of God. Even when EVERY instinct you have says the opposite, KNOW that God is good. Everything will work out for good. When every instinct says to hang on and not let go and let God take control, you have to give that burden over to Him. Or when every instinct says to give in and just forget living life, keep hope and trust in the power of God and good to win out.

Yes, life is unfair. There are consequences for actions that you have no control over that may affect you, blindside you, anger you, take you down. As long as you are still breathing, you can have faith that God is working through it to achieve good. Did he create the mess? No. He can make it work for good. Good for you, good for the world, good for your family, your life, your future.

Does that mean he has a 'reason' or 'lets things happen'? No. It means you have to trust that He has a goal and He is there working no matter what unfair thing happens to you as a result of some other cause. You are not in control and you cannot judge, nor ascribe traits to God who created everything. You have to trust. You have to believe. 

Learning from My Mistakes: Being a Good Leader

I've been VERY busy with school. I have had to make some significant changes to my classroom schedule including adapting for a new student and making changes required by my supervisor. I have begun to deal with the changes that giving my students a Standardized Test which pulls me away from teaching for at least a whole day have wrought upon my schedule. Schedules and plans are the center of my day.

It's also been stressful with adults in my room, my support team, not supporting me. Sometimes it is completely justified, and sometimes it is not. I'm human. I make mistakes. I fall for manipulations, I break things, I forget things, and I get distracted.

I'm on the comeback from some of those mistakes. The student who was such trouble the first 7 weeks is responding to the changes I have made. My support team has been able to de-stress about me and my leadership and again supported me.

I need to find a way to thank them. I need to thank them all year.

But most of all, I need to learn that to be a good leader, I have to be mean sometimes.

I have to change schedules, making some changes that people won't like. Secondly, I have to take their criticism of my actions less personally. That's the hardest for me. I take so much personally. I have cried, lost sleep, and stressed out hard over these personal attacks which I have made worse on myself.

I learned 3 things.

First, that I have to stop explaining my actions and do things to show them I am trying and working. I always want to be an example, but I can't see myself and how I appear to others. I may be doing my job, but appear to be sitting, observing, avoiding, ignoring, or even procrastinating. I have to work with the students, with a clipboard, with a visual schedule right there in front of my class.

Second, their opinions are often skewed. I may be falsely accused. It is far better to talk to me, ask me, and trust that I am telling the truth. Once, one of my staff felt that I was a liar and all my defensive answers to her questions were covering up the truth. They were not. It's hard to convince someone you are being honest when all they hear are lies. In this instance, I was able to later acknowledge her claim, bring evidence that I was not lying, and she had cooled off enough to accept my defense as truth.

Lastly, if I need to confront them, I have back-up in my supervisors. I can present the issue to them and take heart in the fact that I don't have to fight this battle alone. They will intervene if necessary and they will do so tactfully. I hope my 'bosses' are leaders, as I haven't given them the change to 'develop' me and 'coach' me as the pic above defines.