Soulmate

Most people think their spouse is supposed to be their soulmate.

I know I did.

I think this belief is propagated in Disney Princess movies. Our Prince Charming, Aladdin, Eric, or Flynn is supposed to be perfect and someone we can live happily ever after with.



Did you know that you can have more than one soulmate?

I'm not talking about polygamy, polyamory, adultery, or any of that stuff.

I'm talking about redefining the term Soulmate.


Sounds right. Thanks Dawson's Creek.

But no where does it say that this person has to be your spouse, the opposite gender, or the same age. No where does it say that this person remains in your life forever. No where does it say that this isn't several people, who may or may not be in your life at the same time.

At different times of our lives we will need and want different types of relationships.

How do you know if you have found a soulmate?

1. Indescribable Connection

Firstly, you will feel a sense of having known this person for all of your life. They will 'get' you. You will 'get' them. 

• You may experience HUGE changes when you meet. You may shift directions entirely. You may experience emotions you never knew you could feel - extreme highs and lows.

2. Intertwining passions 

This is probably how you will meet. You both will love the same things. When you get together and work on those things, you will challenge and inspire each other to greater heights than ever before. You feel the need to team up and conquer something.

When we get together we pop off like Fourth of July - Hollyn

3. Complete Ease

There is no guilt, no nerves, no shame when you are around your soul mate. Despite what society, religion, culture, has to say, when you two are together, everything is perfect. No one has to understand you, but you.

• You will know what the other person is thinking or feeling intuitively.

4. Mutual Growth

Lastly, you both will grow together. You learn from each other's failures and when you are apart, you still grow and learn. You bring out the best in each other.

The hard part:

Sometimes, once the lesson is learned, the person will drift away, having completed their mission. You will never forget them.

Here's the part you need to understand.

This is not the same as a Life Partner.

Soulmates can be your Life Partner, but they don't have to be. It's only in recent times that we expect our spouses to be in tune to us. Think about it.

(Or read here.)

Your spouse is your Life Partner.

What is a Life Partner?

• Your relationship is based on being physically present and creating new memories.
• You both feel a sense of financial and emotional stability by being together.
• You resonate with each others beliefs, ideas or religion/philosophy.
• Your relationship is based on logical or intellectual decisions.
• You get along like best friends- your relationship does not suffer from extremes.
• You enjoy getting to know each other and learn about your differences and similarities- everything about each other feels new and exciting.
• You feel attracted to each other physically and resonate with each others values.

http://foreverconscious.com/the-difference-between-soulmates-and-life-partners

This distinction has helped me greatly and I hope it helps you, too.

Uplifting Song for Valentine's

Since OuterHoard's comment to the previous post indicated that this song was about his impression of me, and since I've been so open with you about who I am in the 30 days of blogging pieces in January, I feel confident in posting this.


THE ROAD LESS TRAVELED (Coleman and Bartle, Sunrise After Tilling)
-----------------------

My friend walks the road less traveled
An unsealed road of discipline
She's sometimes led and sometimes driven
Sometimes hungry, sometimes fed
While we, the many, walk a highway
Lit so bright it must be true
She walks lanes that too few enter
Where tiny lanterns dot the gloom.

My friend turned her back on power
She chose another mobility
She finds peace in smaller places
For weakness is the source of grace
While we, the many, ask for praises
Through pride we're watered, so we grow
She avoids the kiss of culture
Down into the silence goes.

My friend walks a track that's stony
An uphill climb to God knows where
Sometimes she's touched by an ache so poignant
Sometimes she's driven to despair
While we, the many, skirt the painful
We, the many, anaesthetise
My friend looks, she seeks her darkness
She digs to find the better prize.


I think this song is saying a lot. And on days like Valentine's, we need to hear things that uplift us and make us feel special. It's nice to think that all the digging and despair is getting me somewhere; that it makes me a unique individual, the hardships mold me. Thoughts like that can give a girl strength.

I hope this song has reminded you to keep trudging through to reach the prize.



This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.