$60,000

http://spreadsomeawesome.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/02/Memorabilia-at-Fridays-1024x667.jpg

I sat with my family in a booth at TGIFriday's for lunch after seeing a movie (it was a winter vacation family mini date) and I overheard a young adult gentleman counseling his young adult female friend (possibly his sister?) about income. He claimed that $60,000 dollars was the annual income you needed to be at to pay all your bills, save up some money, and save for retirement.

Mentally, I considered this counsel and snickered. First, I wagered that I was in the wrong career since he claimed to make just under that already, but after the sad wistful feeling wore off, I realized he was not taking into account supporting others. If you are SINGLE, $60K is definitely enough to feel satisfied. If you have kids, you'll be in so much debt trying to afford a larger house, larger vehicle, and feeding and clothing them, let alone school fees. He also never mentioned paying off his student loans, either. He's only getting half the picture.

I reflected on being a young adult, with half the pieces of the puzzle of life figured out. Once you finally learn all the life skills that high school never taught you about budgeting, laundry, bills, checking, loans, interest, insurance, and credit you think you have a handle on this adult life thing.

But you don't.

Perhaps this young man would have the knowledge to overcome all possible new obstacles smoothly and feel he always had life by the reigns and perhaps he always will as he learns new nuances about life. Maybe he will advance in his career and decide he needs 120K to live well, or perhaps he will be gobsmacked by a lack of 'gap insurance', or swindled by medical fees, or face any number of challenges that life has a way of hiding.

What would $60K do for me, as a one time gift, right now?

Just for kicks, I sat in the booth and mused about a windfall of this amount as I chewed my 1/2 club sandwich. I'd pay off my student loans, some credit cards that are nearly paid off anyway, re-roof the house, and sock some away for a vacation.

But that isn't very generous of me.

I've decided my new focus is to be more generous. This is my new Resolution. I'll write a post on it later.

Back to the money..

The husband and I have finally gotten on our feet for the first time. We have squeaked by this year paying down old debts and not incurring new ones. We discussed, briefly, what the next step is.

See, we both have had some rough dealings with work. I'm hesitant to say that these kinds of issues wouldn't occur in another place at another time, because they are mostly social in nature. People will always be people and people have a way of being selfish, arrogant, backstabbing, emotionally abusive, or exhausting in so many ways.

We all make mistakes, but calling our current positions stepping stones to something greater might not be one. What if this time in our lives is to prepare us for something greater? We've discussed the dreaded word 'moving' if it means that better things are out there. So far, we haven't made any huge decisions, but we've opened ourselves up to possibilities and opportunities. In this time where we desperately seek change to get away from the caustic environments of our jobs, we are still cautious and wary. We know from experience not to jump into things too quickly.

It's also good to remember where we came from and the young adult mistakes we ourselves made.

The Last 10 Years

A friend of mine posted on facebook that he was glad to see a year with a 5 in it. The last time we had a year with a 5 in it was 10 years ago.

I began to think back 10 years.

2005

It was 3 years before I started to blog.

The husband and I took an official honeymoon in March on a shoestring budget to Niagara Falls and Toronto. We left the 2 year old in the care of my parents and brother. We stayed in the cheapest hotel and only spent money on food. It was cold and the Maid of the Mist wasn't running. There was ice on the falls. We enjoyed being tourists, but the only attraction we could afford was one of the arcades. This was the highlight of my year. It was the first thing that popped into my head when I thought of the year '05.

I graduated from college in May. This was not the first thing that popped into my head, because I didn't attend my college graduation. I didn't want to sit through the speeches alone. My family would not be attending. It wasn't a big deal.

How you do homework with a toddler

We moved back to our home city to be near family. It was an old house we rented near a big college football stadium. It was okay except for fall homecoming. Band music, cheering, lights, drunken college kids; not my thing. I'd just left that behind. In fact, I never went to any homecoming in high school or college. Sports are not my thing.

I worked that summer taking care of adults with special needs in a group home, driving for an hour to the location. Later, I would switch companies to be closer to home.

I missed the window for interviewing in this county's school system and began to substitute teach in the fall. I picked up a job right away as an education assistant working one-on-one with a boy in a wheelchair. I enjoyed this job. I enjoyed working in the group homes, too, even though it was much harder and much more stressful. I feel...useful, fulfilled, knowing I am helping people.

Sometime in that year I think I made homemade applesauce. I don't even like applesauce. I think my son ate most of it.

In the winter, we filed for bankruptcy when our house didn't sell. We took care of some stupid debt mistakes, including surrendering my car which we were paying too much for. It was a rough time of learning, growing up, and being adults. I think the next 2 years were even rougher, though. Maybe even the next 7 years.

It was a rough year, one of lessons learned.

2005 was the beginning of rock bottom. I was whiny, insecure, immature, couldn't see my dreams through all the stormy clouds of life. I deleted most of those blog posts from '08 and '09 and '10, etc. They were embarrassing, or too revealing; unprofessional.

2014 was a pretty good year compared to '12 and '13. It started a little rough, with my learning what it was like to have a difficult student and feeling like a failure. I graduated from the next phase of my college classes. I put that Spring semester behind me and jumped into a new school year with both feet. I redesigned my classroom, my schedule, and rejoiced in the new challenges that would come. I felt ready, but still armored up with the knowledge that things could change at any moment.

And here it is, 2015.

I bought a new planner and organized my time into it. I set a time for workouts, for lesson planning, for dinner, for me-time, for date time, for writing time, and for homework. I know things will happen to interrupt my planned schedule, but having things planned gives me freedom to accept those changes.

It also helps me set goals. My family now knows I workout at 5. They encourage me not to miss it. Having a set time frees me up to choose how to spend it. I can Wii Zumba, use the elliptical and do some bodyweight exercises, or punch the new punching bag in my living room. (The boys are loving that punching bag, by the way.) I can decide if I want a cardio day, a strength day, a stretching day, a dance day, or a mix-of-whatever day. One day the weather will be nice again and I can start biking, walking the dog, jogging, and outside exercises.


The expert say to take small steps to reach a goal. They say to set goals. Setting a time for a workout and planning my day is a small, but very important step to achieving something awesome.

When I thought back to that weekend trip in 2005, I also recalled that we wanted to take the boys there on a vacation someday. We've been talking a lot about that elusive word, 'vacation', and how it compares to 'trip'. I am hoping that my new scheduling/organizing skills will spill over to saving skills and more wise choices that result in a 'trip' or a 'vacation' or both.

Hey, gas prices are back down to the same that they were in 2005... and I am in a better financial place. How did we do it back then? Have enough to go on a weekend excursion? If we did it 10 years ago, we can stubbornly do it again. Determination. Goals. Dreaming Big.